the secret lives of XTC

The sought-after "Three Wise Men" single.

The rare 
"Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen" single, starring Colin Moulding as The Colonel.

The great lost psychedelic band of the 60s, The Dukes of Stratosphear! The cover to the "You're A Good Man Albert Brown (Curse You Red Barrel)" 12" EP.

It need not be said that British art-pop band XTC is not prolific. From the beginning of their recording career as not-quite-punks in 1977 they have regularly turned out much more than the requisite number of album tracks, re-recording "single" versions as their label demanded, or just making good use of the studio time they were granted under their contract, by committing simple tunes, demos, or goofy instrumentals to tape and subsequently vinyl. So taking into account foreign issues and their many picture sleeves and lavish deluxe single packaging, to be an XTC vinyl completist can truly be compared to being a Beatles vinyl completist (not *another* Fabs comparison!). 

Occasionally, however, conditions were such that they would need a bit of a break from the task at hand, and dive in and have some fun (something XTC is known for, the humor in even their supposedly deeper songs).  With this in mind, let's take a look at some eXTra-Curricular activity and explore the Secret Life of XTC.

The Colonel - "Too Many Cooks in the Kitchen" / "I Need Protection"

Feeling frustrated with his contributions to XTC's albums to that point, Colin Moulding took advantage of the fact that his composition "Making Plans for Nigel" had become a sizable UK hit for the band. He convinced Virgin Records to let him go into the studio and record a one-off single with a look to developing a side solo career to XTC under the name "The Colonel".

Taking XTC drummer Terry Chambers and some other musicians and female singers into the studio with him, Moulding cut 2 sides which were released as a 45, complete with illustrated sleeve,  under the Colonel name. 

"Too Many Cooks" is a rather lightweight ska-influenced tune, almost cartoony, with Moulding sounding like he is singing through a megaphone, underpinned by a staccato hyped-up-reggae organ and Chambers' particular drumbeat characterized by Andy Partridge as "Peasoup! Peasoup!", a curious cross between ska and stereotypical disco that was used to great effect on the XTC single "Generals and Majors" (also written by Moulding). Add some female "ooh la-la" vocals and you have a near-novelty single...

"I Need Protection" is rather caveman-ish, heavy on Chambers' toms, lots of echo, and a Neanderthal chorus singing "Ohhh I need protection" repeatedly...Rather a heavy counterpart to "Too Many Cooks".

Unfortunately England was not ready for Colonelmania and the single flopped. Moulding regrouped his efforts toward XTC after this one.

The Three Wise Men - "Thanks for Christmas"/"Countdown to Christmas Party Time"

Prior to recording their "Big Express" LP, XTC met up with classical producer David Lord at his studio to discuss the possibility of his producing their next album. As a trial run, they recorded a tune that Partridge had had laying around for a while and thought would be a good holiday release for Virgin. 

Partridge's initial idea was to have XTC record the instrumental backing but have the vocals performed by the female members of the Virgin Records staff, many of whom were reportedly named Mary, the resultant record would be released under the name The Virgin Marys!!! When that idea was quashed, they came up with the persona of The Three Wise Men, and the single was released under that name with the additional credit of "Produced by The Three Wise Men and The Good Lord". Leave it to XTC...

The song is full of good-time Christmas sounds, beginning with big-snare 80s drum machine and sleigh bells, then incorporating lots of acoustic guitars and synthesized "Bach" trumpet a la "Penny Lane". The vocals on the track, however, are unmistakably XTC at their Beatlesque best.

The flip side is a funky Christmas rave-up, lots of drum machine, glurging synth bass, "Boogie Nights" guitar, and rather sparse lyrics that are equally feel-good in nature. It wouldn't be complete without a "Le Freak"-style group shout "ahhhhHHHHHHHHHH it's CHRISTMAS!"

Of special note is the custom label used on the 45, it is a silhouette drawing of the scene of the Three Wise Men approaching Bethlehem, and while two of them are riding camels, the third is following them and pulling a tricycle on a rope behind him! Hilarious.

The Dukes of Stratosphear

Towards the end of 1984, Andy Partridge and XTC's first producer John Leckie were contracted by Virgin to produce an album by a female singer-songwriter. When they were taken off the project at the behest of the singer, they asked for compensation from Virgin in the form of a small advance to record another pet project that had been hanging around for a while.

Buried deep in Andy's psyche, the Dukes were waiting to be sprung forth and this was it. They recorded the 6-song EP "25 O'Clock" in about two weeks in a true 60s work ethic [keeping overdubs and electronic intrusion to a minimum], under the budget given them by Virgin, which to their credit, not only agreed to release it, but got into the spirit by resurrecting the original Virgin Records label and acting as if this was a long-lost EP from the 60s that was just discovered in a warehouse.

Andy Partridge became Sir John Johns, Colin Moulding became The Red Curtain, Dave Gregory became Lord Cornelius Plum, and Dave's brother Ian was recruited to provide the drums for the Dukes under the name E.I.E.I. Owen!

Unbelievably, "25 O'Clock" was a modest hit and outsold XTC's 2 previous LPs. Andy gave a few interviews as "Sir John Johns" with his voice electronically altered, and a wacky video for "The Mole from the Ministry" was filmed. More importantly, the income from the EP's sales helped XTC repay their advances from Virgin.

Later on, following the success of XTC's "Skylarking" album and the song "Dear God", the Dukes came together one last time to record the "Psonic Psunspot" LP in 1987, as a means of giving Virgin enough material to make a full-length Dukes CD. This was released later in 1987 as "Chips from the Chocolate Fireball (An Anthology)", comprising "Psonic Psunspot" and "25 O'Clock".

Sadly, the Dukes are dead. Andy has revealed that they all died in a "bizarre kitchen accident", and their now-grown children had considered forming a group in their memory called the Lemon Dukes, but it never happened.

Lucky for us, we have the remnants of the Dukes legacy available to us in the form of the "Chips" CD, which contains every Dukes recording save one which appeared on a small compilation. We are thankful for The Dukes of Stratosphear.

Links

Chalkhills - the definitive XTC website and mailing list, and one of the most visited sites on the entire World Wide Web, which should give an indication of XTC's pervasive, if not obvious, influence and fanbase.

Planet Smile/Dukeweb - the Dukes tribute site, including full discography and more cover scans.

Plenty of XTC items...

Sources

Chalkhills
Chris Twomey - "Chalkhills and Children" Buy it at Amazon.com
XTC and Neville Farmer - "XTC: Song Stories" Buy it at Amazon.com